Validation? Anyone?

Today has been a pretty big emotional piece of crap for me. I think it mostly has to do with the big piece of shit I took on my practice GMAT today, leaving me in a whole steaming heap of self doubt, but at least it's a practice test and not the actual test.

This weekend actually started out with so much promise. The girl who I made out with the previous weekend (who actually has a boyfriend she never told me about and continues to believe that I have no idea about her relationship) hinted at the fact that she wants to get together again soon. I then went out on Friday night with some of my boys and turned back into the PUA that I haven't seen in quite a while. I opened a plethora of mixed and different sets, most hooking right away and all but one turning into great, flirty conversations. I got blown out once and was so outcome independent that I didn't even care about it. I was just out having fun with my boys and nothing could take away that frame. I also got the number of this really cute, skinny chick from NY who had an amazing rack. I had visions of playing with those for days.

Saturday night also started out well. Went down to OC to celebrate one of my childhood neighbor's 60th birthday. I had a good time with everyone there since I've known them all practically all of my life and they are all like an extended family. I left knowing that I'd be going out that night with the boys again back in LA. I drove back up and was replaying Friday night and thinking of new openers and new conversation topics. I came up with some great stuff, as in how I could have maybe turned the blowout into something and a new routine I definitely want to try (about how girls always say that they're best friends with each other - different from Style's best friends test). I did have one fear though as I drove back up to LA from OC. Was I going to be able to keep up the momentum from Friday? Or was I going to have my usual letdown the night following a great night?

Ended up starting the night at Viceroy and just wasn't feeling it. I wasn't feeling the crowd, I wasn't feeling the atmosphere. I tried to warm myself up by talking to some cougs (it actually seemed like the whole place was full of cougs), but couldn't get into the right frame of mind for whatever reason. After a couple of drinks at Viceroy, we decided to head to V-Lounge. It was midnight and the line was ridiculously long, so one of my friends ended up paying off the bouncer and we got in right away. That also kinda pissed me off. So I ended up buying a round and what do you know? My favorite bartender was working that night and she hooked us up with drinks...ALL night long. So I proceeded to get pretty trashed and too focused on trying to hook up with her. I went home without really talking to anyone else other than her and my boys, which in retrospect is pretty lame and I predictably had my usual day after letdown.

Fast forward to today and I decide to take a practice GMAT since I'm planning on taking the test soon and do worse now, after taking a 9 week preparation course, than when I took a diagnostic test a couple months back without any preparation. This leaves me in a pretty sour mood (since I had also just wasted 4 hours of the day). In addition, I don't think the girl from NY who's number I got on Friday night is going to call me back. Needless to say, I'm in an emotional spiral of crap right now.

I could really use some validation. Someone? Anyone? Haha. *cries*